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FIGURING IT OUT: Empty is a great place to start

When faced with making a decision because the status quo; your current job, career or business, just isn’t working for you any more, empty is a great place to start.

A busy mind trying to ‘figure things out’ will usually create confusion and ultimately, indecision.

What others think, fear of the unknown, and fear of change and insecurity all come into play. Do I? Don’t I? What, if, when and how? Endless questions, a myriad of answers and opinions all lead to chaos; and in turn that chaos can lead to your exhaustion, confusion, stress and even illness.

The most common theme I see amongst career coaching clients in their first coaching session is that they have spent endless hours trying to figure out what they want to do next.  Have you ever been guilty of being so busy trying to figure things out, there is no space for ideas to flow in?

If this is you, the best and most successful advice I can offer amidst this chaotic thinking is ‘take a week off’, even a day, or just one hour. Set your timer if you must, but make one decision right now; “I’m not making a decision right now”.

If you are looking to make a change and want to take a time out from figuring it out, here are a few simple yet highly effective actions for you to take:

 Find a way of emptying your mind of all the thoughts surrounding the decision topic:

  1. Thoughts; when a busy or negative thought comes into your mind, especially one that seems to be on replay, say ‘cancel’ or ‘delete’ or ‘no thanks’. Whatever language you would usually use. Pick one happy place or thought that makes you smile and focus on that.
  2. Writing; one of my favourite tools is free writing.  It will work for you too.  Set the timer for 5 minutes, pick up your pen and write whatever comes to mind. Avoid filtering what you write. Just write. Do not stop writing. Even if you write, “I don’t know what to write”.  The goal is to keep the pen moving until the timer goes off. 
  3. Exercise; Get off your chuff and go for a walk. Better still do a fitness class or yoga. Anything to get the body moving. Yoga is great because with many of the poses you will have to be in the moment to balance!
  4. Meditate; another great tool. There are endless meditation options to be found by searching online. Choose a simple guided meditation. Yoga Nidra is a great choice as it focuses the mind on parts of the body. It will be impossible to keep thinking about your decision.
  5. Random Act of Kindness; My favourite: do something kind for someone else to take your mind off yourself. Pick up the phone and call a friend. Invite them over or out for a cuppa. Ask how they are and listen. Just listen.  Make the moment about them. I promise you this will work a treat.

How will all of this help?

The simple process of letting go of busy thoughts and emptying your mind will make way for more inspired thought to come in.  The only way I can prove that to you is to encourage you to try it.

A quote I use frequently is, ‘we bring about what we think about’.

In attempting to figure things out, you are filling your mind with a mix of confused thoughts, busy thoughts and scattered thoughts.  All of this is whirling around in your head.  If we go back to the saying ‘we bring about what we think about, then what do you think you will bring about?  What will you attract?

A coach of mine used to talk about the aerial coming out from my mind, like a radio aerial attracting a frequency so that it can pick up the station. She used to tell me that the aerial coming out of my head was confused about what frequency I wanted it to pick up because I was thinking about 1,000’s of radio stations all at once.  Because I was having busy and conflicted thoughts, the aerial couldn’t tune in and manifest what I wanted. All I’d end up with was a muddled mess. 

The answers are far away from the chaos. They will be found in stillness.

If you read this and it sounds true to you, then perhaps you might just be ready to let go and surrender into the stillness; an empty space.

Take some time out.  Give yourself permission to let go for a while and stop trying to figure things out.

The answers will come, but only when there is space for them to arrive into.

Have fun.

Brenda

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Brenda

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